Hypocrisy? It's Worth Asking The Question.

 I have been thinking about this for almost a year.

After seeing a sold-out(!) presentation of the excellent documentary It's A Girl last fall, about the prevalence of gendercide in the world's two largest national populations, my mind was racing.  I was aware of the devaluing of girl children in China as a result of the one-child policy, but I had no idea that the situation even existed in India, let alone is actually worse than China in terms of its sheer horror.  The practice of families aborting or killing daughters because they cannot provide dowries to a suitor's family is widespread.  You gain wealth with sons and lose them with daughters, so people are electing to not allow their daughters to be born, or not allowing them to grow up.  In some cases, abortions are being forced by the state.  After watching the film (www.itsagirlmovie.com) I had short but great chat with the producer, Andrew Brown, who'd flown in from Colorado for the screening.  

I told him that while I felt that the infanticide of young girls was something that could possibly be stopped, what is known as gender fetuscide (the aborting of girls simply because they are girls) would be MUCH more difficult to stop.  I said to him "10 of my girlfriends and I could have abortions tomorrow, and it could be because we find out we're having boys and we want girls. But because no one would know that that's our reason, our right to abortion is strongly fought for."  He replied "That's exactly right.  But if just as many women have abortions in China, it's known that the reason is likely because they're having girls so everyone wants to stop it.  That's why this topic is a minefield."

There's something very unsettling about that dichotomy.  The only difference between us and them is that our reasons for an abortion are allowed to remain private, but some of us could have egregious reasons too.  We can all agree that mandatory government-imposed abortions are unconscionable.  But what about sex-selection abortions?  How do we feel about those?  Abortion is SUCH a contentious issue that although it is explored significantly in It's A Girl, the trailer for the film addresses infanticide and murder only.  When I spoke to Andrew, we talked about what a hot-button topic sex-selection abortion was and why pro-choicers try to keep it out of the discussion of gender-based violence.  The truth is that it pits two strongly contradictory positions against each other: the right to terminate a pregnancy vs. the desire to protect female life - thereby bestowing the child with life. 

And thus - Pandora's box is opened.  Is it a fetus in one instance and a girl in another?  The first word is clinical.  The second word ascribes that clinical term with humanity.  The fact of the matter is that in the two most populated countries on the planet, hundreds of thousands of female fetuses are terminated in-utero for no other reason than because they are female.  Boy children are allowed to be born, girls are not.  There are tales of women having 5, 6, 7 abortions until they conceive a son.  Should that be legal?  If so, why?  If not, why not?  It's very hard to hear and watch those stories and not have tears come to your eyes. 
  
We are blessed to live in a culture in which, for the most part, the unmitigated joy of having either a son or a daughter is equal.  But in many other cultures, girls are clearly understood to be the inferior sex, the plight of their families and a burden on society. If we claim to stand on the side of abortion rights, we then MUST ask ourselves - are we hypocrites - or do we stand for those rights even when the result is the deliberate elimination of the female gender?  Because if there is no hypocrisy in our position, we must be willing to march in the streets with equal passion for the right of millions of women to be able to abort fetus  - or multiple fetuses - for no other reason than because they are girls.

I have been thinking about this for almost a year.

For days after I saw this film, this question kept me awake at night.  What is the "feminist" stand here?  At what point does fighting to stop the systemic termination of females in-utero actually become the feminist thing to do?  At what point might that supercede a woman's right to abort?  Does it ever?  Should it ever?  Maybe the answer is no.  Maybe the deliberate termination of millions of female fetuses is the unfortunate cost of women's rights.

It's taken me this long to write my thoughts because of the unwillingness I see on the part of many feminists to engage in any conversation whatsoever that asks them to even for a moment hold a mirror up to their views.  It's so disappointing.  If you read this and all you feel is the need to respond by freaking out and accusing me of being a traitor to the movement, save your breath.  I'm not interested in antagonism.  What DOES interest me is thoughtful and challenging discussion.  I won't be at all surprised though if nobody feels comfortable enough to have that discussion.  I'd be very pleasantly surprised if anyone did.

I am pro-choice.  That doesn't mean that I can't look inside myself to contemplate this issue, and it doesn't mean that I can't play Devil's Advocate when looking at something this pressing, a reality that is becoming epidemic.  The future of the female half of humanity deserves that much introspection. 

I am not attempting to answer this question.  I don't know the answer.  I am attempting to ask it. 

- TT